Cell leading = Heavy Responsibilty

I signed it. I signed it. I just signed it a couple hours back!! This is another significant event in my Christian life. Of course the 1st was baptism, immersed in the pool in the middle of the sanctuary, then return back to the stage decked in all white then walking down the aisle (sounds like dum da da dum) in twos with a guy I hardly knew. Right, I was baptised without company, so no friends to walk with.
This is different. Somehow, God is so real in my life than He has ever been before. Yes, I still fall and hurt myself, but I know He will be there to kiss the wound and make it all better. I really depend on Him, there's no other way to get enough wisdom to be able to take care of other people. There will always be kinks in life and life without kinks is plain meaningless. I should I say tasteless? I still wonder if life will be meaningless if we don't fall down and suffer.
My main concern now is... Getting my spiritual food, so that I can feed others. And.. Why do I feel so needy??